Sunday, April 23, 2006
Yesterday was a bad day... I dislocated that shoulder again and now I have to wear the shoulder guard for probably a week. Which really makes me marvel at how the girls actually put up with something of a similar sort on a daily basis.
It seems its pretty bad this time around. Can't reach my back without my left shoulder screaming in pain and driving seems to have become a difficulty as well.
Apart from that I suppose there is really nothing much to my dull life. School is terrible,dreadful, agonizing and painful. I really HATE this school and everything else associated with it. Brings me no joy and only serves to make me want to leave everything behind and run away from it.
IF only I could...
Life goes on...
Sunday, April 16, 2006
"Have you ever been in love? Horrible, isn't it?
It makes you so vulnerable.
It opens your chest and it opens your heart and it means someone can get inside you and mess you up.
You build up all these defenses.
You build up this whole armor, for years, so nothing can hurt you, then one stupid person, no different from any other stupid person, wanders into your stupid life.
You give them a piece of you.
They don't ask for it.
They do something dumb one day like kiss you, or smile at you, and then your life isn't your own anymore. Love takes hostages. It gets inside you.
It eats you out and leaves you crying in the darkness, so a simple phrase like 'Maybe we should just be friends' or 'How very perceptive' turns into a glass splinter working its way into your heart.
It hurts.
Not just in the imagination. Not just in the mind.
It's a soul-hurt, a body-hurt, a real gets-inside-you-and-rips-you-apart pain.
Nothing should be able to do that.
Especially not love.
I hate love.
~ Rose Walker ("Sandman Volume 9: The Kindly Ones")
Why is that the thought of going back to school tomorrow fills me with so much saddness and hatred?
I don't wish to return...
Let me run away... Please...
This is foolish.. Why do I hurt so?
~ Dream (The Sandman Volume 8: Brief Lives)
I don't wish to return...
Let me run away... Please...
This is foolish.. Why do I hurt so?
I scarcely knew her.
A handful of months, little more... I would have given her worlds of her own, strung like sapphires and emeralds on a silken cord.
I would have given her.. I keep thinking of her eyes, towards the end.
Cold eyes, weighing me dispassionately, finding me wanting.. And in the end, she told me.
But I knew before she told me.
It was there in her eyes. She had decided she no longer loved me.
It was there in her eyes. She had decided she no longer loved me.
~ Dream (The Sandman Volume 8: Brief Lives)
Life goes on...
Monday, April 10, 2006
Life as a student will begin in just about a week's time. Miserable it will be without a doubt but I guess I'll just have to make the best out of it.
Time flies and 6 weeks of ITP is almost coming to an end. I made so many new friends there and just when our friendship is starting to take flight, I have to leave. I sure will miss them though... *sighs*
Bought a new bench press bar - at least I hope that is what it is called, with two 10kg weights. In fact, I've started training again and this time I am doing it everyday. Haha...
I just want to look better in my clothes. LOL
Life goes on...
Saturday, April 01, 2006
Today was a good day... There is no other better way of putting it. Haha...
Met up with my poly classmates for dinner. As expected, they didnt turn up. Which was a good thing for I still didn't know how to face them. In fact I was prepared to not attend should they go. Rather not go than to go and spoil everyone's mood.
Had dinner at Swensen's which wasn't really what one would call, "worth your every penny". The only good thing to have came out of the dinner other than the company of friends was the ice cream cake. Haha...
Went on to club with a few of them after dinner. Had a glass of Magaritaz and Galsberg. It was really what the chinese would call "People mountain, people sea". The live band wasn't too bad just that it was a tad too loud for my liking.
Should make this kind of clubbing a more integral part of my life... Haha...
Life goes on...